I know i have been hidding it really good but i really have to let it out one way or the other now, for the past 2 months i have been realy stress because of school. Lately i feel like everything is out of my control, i have tried studying hard and being as prepare as i can before a midterm but it seems like it have not helped at all. I'm so lost, i don't know who i can share all of my feelings with i know i have kelvin who i'm really close with but for some reason i don't want hm to see that emotional side of me, and plus i know if i tell him how depress i have been feeling lately i won't be able to stop crying, he always make me so emotionally weak =P
Yesterday he told me he don't trust me at all and it just all of the sudden hit me that i'm actually very depress, i don't know why i feel like me and kelvin is currently not as close a we used to be when we were together, don't get me wrong i still love him lots or maybe even more but on the other hand i feel he is less attached with me, maybe is because he don't really have enough time alone (since i always get him to stay on the phone with me) aiiii i just really want us to see again because i know that will make us alot better. i guess now all i should focus on is school while hoping the time will go by asap.
- i wish he could just like me for who i'm NOW, love me for the person i'm NOW and consider nothing about the past but the present and future, i really don't ever want to mendtion or bring up the things that happened to me in the past anymore, can we just let the past stay in the best and make sure we can make the best out of the best for the coming years in the future, please just let me breathe please :'( i love him so much i can't afford to see this to end i really can't .......................................... please just trust me that i love you PLEASE :'( i really can't take this anymore....... *i can't stop crying*
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